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How to deal with the end of a relationship?



Hello, dear reader!

I begin our text today with a biblical passage from ECCLESIASTES chapter 3 from verses 1 to 8:


  1. Everything has its appointed time, and there is a time for every purpose under heaven:

  2. There is a time to be born and a time to die; a time to plant and a time to uproot what has been planted;

  3. A time to kill and a time to heal; a time to tear down and a time to build up;

  4. A time to weep and a time to laugh; a time to mourn and a time to leap;

  5. A time to scatter stones and a time to gather stones; a time to embrace and a time to turn away from embracing;

  6. A time to seek and a time to lose; a time to keep and a time to throw away;

  7. A time to tear and a time to sew; a time to be silent and a time to speak;

  8. Time to love and time to be bored; time for war and time for peace.

These verses remind us that all things have a beginning and an end. Just as the seasons follow one another, the cycles of life also follow a pattern. This includes the relationships we have along our journey.


Sometimes there comes a time when a relationship comes to an end. As hard as it is to accept, it's important to remember that everything will be fine and to move on with dignity and gratitude.


Just as we plant seeds to reap fruit, we also cultivate relationships to reap love, companionship and mutual growth.

However, there are times when these relationships no longer serve us or make us happy.

That's when we need to recognize the end of the cycle.


The end of a relationship can bring sadness, confusion and even anger.


It's normal to feel these emotions, but it's also important to remember that the end of a relationship doesn't define our ability to love or be loved.


Just as the foundation of a house can make way for a new building, the end of a relationship can pave the way for new opportunities and personal growth.


As a reference, I leave you with a movie that you may even know, called EAT, PRAY AND LOVE, which speaks a little to what I'm bringing up here.


If you are connected to your I Am, which is your inner wisdom, and act with emotional intelligence, the end of a relationship can be a chance to reflect on what we have learned, our needs and what we really want in a relationship.


It is essential to respect the feelings of both parties during this process. Everyone KNOWS or should KNOW what is best for them.


In the school of life, if our senses are alert, we realize that the other person only gives what they have and that's fine.


Communicate openly and if you feel you want and need to end a relationship in a healthy way, allow yourself to do so and allow the two of you to move on.


As much as it may seem like it at times, the end of a relationship is not the end of the world, as it is part of life.


It's an opportunity to reconnect with yourself, evaluate your successes and mistakes and allow yourself to experience the new, growing and learning from your experiences.


Whether in affective relationships (love), family relationships (family members), social relationships (friends) or professional relationships (work).


When love relationships end, it's important to remember that our expectations, when not adjusted, can't always maintain a healthy relationship.


Dialogue is important, realizing that the other person is the other person with their desires, beliefs and values, and you are you with your values, beliefs and desires.


Sometimes people change and grow in different directions and this can lead to the end of the relationship.


In the case of friendships, it's common for people to drift apart over time due to life changes, such as moving to another city, changing jobs or changing interests.


This doesn't mean that the friendship is over, but rather that it has changed shape. It's important to cherish the good memories and keep in touch, even if it's not as often as before.

In the case of family relationships, the end can be more complicated due to deep emotional ties. However, it's important to remember that each person has their own life and their own choices.


It's not always possible to maintain a healthy relationship with some family members. So it's crucial to realize when it's time to walk away.


Either I remain by the other's side in peace and harmony or I leave in peace!


A healthy break-up begins with open and honest communication between both parties.

Expressing your feelings and listening to each other's feelings is essential to understanding the reasons behind the break-up and to avoiding future resentment.


Each person has their own needs and desires, and they don't always align. They are different perspectives!


During a healthy break-up, it's essential to respect each other's boundaries and emotions.

Give yourself and the other person space to process feelings and allow yourself to feel the pain of the end of the relationship when it's inevitable!


An unhealthy break-up is based on blame, accusation and pain.


If this happens, don't feel guilty or blame the other person, as this can prolong the pain and hinder the healing process. Everyone only gives what they have to give at the moment.


For example: A couple who split up due to a lack of maturity and who, over time, have learned, grown and developed into a mature relationship, opting for a new way of relating.


I would say that the important part of a healthy break-up is taking care of yourself.


Because it's normal to feel a mixture of emotions and feelings during this period, allow yourself to go through these phases in your own time and in your own way.


Keep in mind that you deserve a relationship that is based on respect and love, providing mutual happiness.


We all deserve to be happy and to find healthy relationships. I'm not just talking about love relationships here, but friendship, family and professional relationships that contribute to our purpose in life and make us feel more complete.


I suggest 5 steps to deal with when a relationship comes to an end:


1. Allow yourself to feel: Don't repress your feelings, they are part of the healing process.

But don't hold them hostage. Welcome the feeling, talk to it, but let it go when you realize it's not doing you any good.

2. Take care of yourself: Exercise, eat healthily, try to get a good night's sleep. Practice meditation before bed and prioritize self-care.

3. Avoid excessive contact: In the beginning, it's best to avoid excessive contact with your ex.

Give yourself some space to process the break-up. This can also help prevent emotional relapses.

4. Learn from the experience: Reflect on the relationship and the reasons that led to the break-up. Use this opportunity to learn about yourself and your relationship patterns. This can help you grow personally and avoid mistakes in the future.

5. Focus on the future: Concentrate on building a positive future for yourself.

How?


Set personal and professional goals and look for activities that interest you. Keep busy and keep your mind open to new opportunities.


Dealing with the end of a relationship takes time and each person has their own pace of healing.


Like Dr. Milton H. Erickson, considered the father of natural hypnosis, I believe that you have the inner resources to overcome this difficult phase.

Shall we think about it?


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